These Were the Times

These were the times of heresy and discovery.

These were the days Ivan (first from the right) introduced me to a Rosicrucian Order, and challenged my faith and dogma.

These were the days our maid took me to gnostic masses and challenged me to see my privilege.

These were the days of attempting to extract nutrient from flowers to feed the hungry, of seeing specters appear and glide, of exploring abandoned scientific instruments in a University closed by the army.

These were the days before the girlfriends and the bullets, before the depression and suicidal thoughts. These were the days before the hanging by my ankles over a four story building to make me panic. These were the days before the finding of my true strength.

These were my Zacamil days, when that funny looking boy, second from the right, saw the world open up and the storm of time showed him infinity and the eternal power of not being.

Was I ever truly him? How did he know to survive by becoming me?

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God Fearing

The god-fearing are victims of their ignorance. Ignorance is not knowing who you truly are. Ignorant of their true nature, they believe the little gods of their imagination have created them. The more they fear, the more they channel the force of fear to create a world full of evidence that they are powerless. They become trapped by the power of their own ignorance. The gods they created are placed as guardians of their prison.

The free human being does not draw from the power of fear.

The people of knowledge, free from ignorance, do not hold guards to keep them trapped. They are free from belief, and free from fear.

They Had to Keep Us Ashamed

“The high priests of the slave religions knew that for the human being to never be able to reclaim the magnificent vistas of the higher worlds, and for the human being to nevermore be able to satiate the yearning and the pain, they had to keep us ignorant.

They had to keep us ashamed of this force that rises from the loins, that inundates the body. They had to make us believe—really believe—that this force was only for procreation; and for those who rebelled, to make us believe that this force could also be used for fun. While both are true, they hid from us that these forces are not just for procreation or fun; they hid from us that the very force that creates a universe is hidden in our flesh.

From then on, all those who create churches or gods, families and groups; all those that divide us between genders, clans, politics, casts, nations and social class, are only working to keep us away from the true genius that lies dormant within the dark confines of the flesh.“––The Witches’ Sabbath

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What’s with All the Narratives Out There?

In the process of birthing the New Sun, which is also the process of creating the Human Being, we will see all the worlds melting as they approach the core of being, and then dissolve. You will experience all possibilities, and will seem to be performing all things; because even the consciousness of humanity is becoming one at the same time that it’s becoming all.

The human mind is one. One mind operating in the human being, but it is being experienced by every body in a different way. So, my nervous system, my experience, my language, and my personal history are a particular instantiation of the human experience––and so is yours and everybody else’s. There is no such thing as my mind and your mind. There is my experience and your experience, but the mind is one.

This over-mind is experiencing through each of us, and as we approach this historical event horizon, we increase the number of events we experience, and as the frequency of happenings increases, we begin to feel what is like to be all and none.

Identify with anything that is not the true center of things and you will always be experiencing the struggle. All things are happening now. All things are being experienced. And you are doing all things, except not all through your own body.

We used to live only in a planetary world. Now, we still live in a planetary world, but more of us are becoming exposed to the birthing process of the New Sun, and therefore the world is not going to be solid for a while. Not until it becomes cosmic.

The awareness of different planes is more at hand. Observe, then. Stop trying to figure out which of the narratives is the truest. There is no true narrative. You will never find the real reality of what is happening out there. Who is really controlling the world? Nobody is controlling the world. What world can survive at the core of this celestial explosion? None.

You are seeing the struggle of worlds as they merge. The more you try to make your understanding solid the more the mystery will embody your experience and destroy it. Become the mystery. Not the secrets. There are no secrets. There is just the surrounding unknown in the middle of this awareness that is forever trying to go within and forever giving of itself.

In that constant struggle between burning within myself and giving my light to the world I become one with this new being that is being born. And as I observe all my lifetimes and all my possibilities I feed my fire with all things. I love all things. I perform all things. I understand all things. I dissolve myself even as I give myself. And I find nothing to hold.

Do not despair then when you see all the confusion of the worlds outside. Do not think that this is just because you are going crazy. You are going crazy but that’s not why this is all so confusing. It’s also confusing. Stop trying to figure out what the true narrative is. All narratives are exploding and imploding. A New Sun is being born and it’s here at the core of our experience. And it’s here with the voice of the sound-that-makes that the heralding of the new light is carried.

Can Your World Survive the Times to Come?

What planet can survive the core of a star?

Imagine a planet made of solid brass or lead, heavy and strong, in it’s immovable orbit towards the sun. At first, before it enters the limits of Pluto, this planet will be cold, frozen, heavy, strong. It would be the hardest thing that you would ever see.

As it begins to come closer to the Sun, it begins to reflect the light of the Sun shining bright as if it were made of gold––but it’s not. It is just solid metal, still cold, but as it gets closer and closer by the time it passes Venus and Mercury it begins to heat up. It is still solid, but hot.

There will be a moment when one side is hot and one side is cold, and then there will be another moment when all of it is lit with heat. And then, that planet that was once so solid, as it enters the threshold of the sphere of the Sun, it begins to liquify. What was once solid is now liquid, and then it becomes gaseous, and then it’s completely gone.

Now there is no more planet. It’s just the sun, exactly as it was before.

So it is with the birth of this new consciousness that the human being is trying to birth. All the old worlds are melting away. They’re all gone. And if your identity and your sense of safety is placed on any old world, it will melt. Only by aligning your awareness to the awareness of the New Sun can you forge a new identity; only then can you forge the type of consciousness that can carry such an awareness, and you become a little bit like that Sun dying and birthing at the same time––not in the Christian sense where you die to the world to be reborn later. It’s more like the star who is, or like a flame who at the same time that it is alive and illuminated, it is also consuming itself.

That is what the Sun is doing. It is consuming itself, and giving itself to all around. Align your consciousness to the reality of the New Sun and then you will be as a reflection of this New Sun: evernew, everdying and of irrevocable intent.

Lightning in My Head

In the midst of a massacre, we were laying down at Hell’s gate, waiting for death.

Looking up, I saw a peaceful blue sky far above us. My ankle was throbbing from a shot wound, right where an asp had bit me in a dream days earlier.

Like lightning inside the head, the realization that all states are already in me struck.

This bolt of light showed me the opening across the dream beyond which lies the path of mastery of perception.

A Note to the Person who Said It’s not a Big Deal to be Told to Go Back Where you Came From.

People like me are told those hateful words all the time. They are meant to make you feel less, and to get others to bully you. They are meant to make feel out of place, like your contribution doesn’t count, and like you will never be welcome in your own land.

It is a racist move precisely because of that intent. Yes, we all learn to live with it, to ignore it, and to continue being decent human beings.

Nonetheless, it hurts.

It hurts to see it being done to your children and the people you love. It’s easy for you to say “so what? Get over it. It’s not a big deal”

Ah! The callousness of the privileged! How well you mask your racism under a pretense of emotional equanimity! Those of us who have experienced over and over, however, can see the truth behind your pretend wisdom. You are not above the fray. You are the instigator.

Sharing my Inner Space/ 32 years of Art (a book review)

I have read Martivón Galindo’s Sharing My Inner Space, and I realize now that with every painting and every poem she has been marking a special space in the journey that so many of us undertook back in the 80’s, when the Salvadoran diaspora uprooted us from the place where we wanted to live, love, die, and create. We left because we had to, away from decades of war and oppression, and everywhere we went we kept looking hard inside the most recondite corners of the heart for that something we brought with us, to make a life and create art, and to find ourselves even in places that forever made us feel strangers.

In this book, Martivón gifts us with a tremendous experience through the use of poetry, print, and painting. It is a powerful storm that penetrates your consciousness under the command of an accomplished artist who has dived into the depths of her soul, and confronting the turbulent history of war, exile, emerges in ultimate triumph a master of her perceptions. She takes us through her encounter with exile, an event that shaped an entire generation of Salvadorans, but she does more than make us look at the world, she takes us with her as the seed of her soul emerges from that encounter triumphant, and continues to create and define her artistic world.

Martivón is not content with showing us her skill and creativity. She shares with us that most intimate process of her genius: the process she has gone through as she discovers her true self. We witness this discovery when she manages to put in word and image the creative powers of a soul that is always seeking justice and always burning bright with the wild fire of truth.

Porque lo invisible es el misterio
encerrado en la lágrima de una estrella
Ayer como hace treinta años
busco lo que no está
para encontrar mi luz
mi propia sombra
en el invisible gran universo de lo posible––Martivon (pg. 160)

Every great artist has an inner process through which her silent, intimate center faces the vast expanse of the unknown, and every one of them produce art that touches in us that most intimate abode. Their art awakens somehow our own truth. Martivón’s art does that for us, of course, but she takes a step further. Sharing My Inner Space is a living document showing that invisible inner process through which her genius emerges.

Witnessing this book is a most enjoyable experience. I promise you, the core of your perception will be touched by it, and you will find yourself on a journey through your own inner space. I recommend this book unreservedly.

The Rage of Fascism is the Whisper of a Dying World.

Don’t be afraid of the rise of fascism. Bring stability into your heart. Know the truth for yourself. Look around and see how many people actually are moving away from bigotry and racism. See how many or us are really, really thirsty for justice and equality. 

How many of us truly can see in each others eyes and see something divine? If you are one of us, know we are going to be okay. The way we conceive the world is how we are shaping it. We are dreaming the new world together. 

They have loud voices, and they want you to panic. They are giving a message of fear, so they make it seem like a loud roar, but that’s all there is. Here, in your heart, know that death is all around us and that that is no reason to panic. We still have this life, and in this life we get to create, write, speak, etch, mold and share a moment with one another, and we get to practice the truth that is in the heart, no matter what the patriots and the fanatics and the fearful say. They will not win. 

So, welcome the foreigner into your home. Welcome your brother and sister. Open your heart to all manners of religious expressions, to all manner of sexual identity. Open your heart to humanity. The hatred is waning. 

There is still work to do, but we have to go through this moment. It’s not that the world is getting worse. We are simply getting to the limits of what we can tolerate. We are seeing the forces we won’t tolerate trying to go back to the “glories” of racist policies, to the “great times” of segregation and the Middle Ages. understand that they are freaking out. The world as they thought it was is shaking. Their world feels unstable and they are panicking. This is why they are acting the way they are acting. Their world is dying. 

After all the wars and all the oppression and all the racism, we who have been alive in this continent for the past 500 years, know that we are awakening and we see the new world. We have seen it. Now remain calm––steady. Let them scream and rage. Their rage is the dying whisper of the old world. We are bringing the new. Keep your heart steady and loving. When you see the door, it is with that calm efficiency that we will walk through it.